He said ‘mamma, kek!’ So I had to make the world’s best brownies for my one in a million toddler!
Prologue
My 18-month old is already the biggest fan of my baking experiments. Until now, the hubby was always faced with the sensitive task of obligingly tasting the slightly pully bread, the slightly browned biscuits, or the slightly eggy cakes. Now, I have a new admirer who looks at me in wonder with his big doe eyes as I beat the eggs, lick the batter, do the thing. But like every other child, his all time fave is the easy peasy chocolate brownie I make. It’s a complete crowd pleaser. It’s what made me popular! Just kidding (no, I’m not).
So, last evening when we were strolling in the park, I asked him ‘What would you like for dinner today?’ He thought for a second and said ‘mamma, kek!’ with the widest of smiles, his 8 tiny teeth peeping out at me. Obviously, no mom in her right mind is going to bake a brownie at 7pm and definitely not for dinner! So I promised (the cross my heart & hope to die kinda promise) that I would make it soon. And you never want to break your promises with 18-month olds. Never ever.
So here goes. This recipe is dead easy and takes 10 minutes to measure everything, 10 minutes on the stove, and 20 minutes to bake. It’s one of those anyone-can-bake recipes. It is disaster proof to some extent; unless you leave it in the oven and start watching Suits (Harvey Spectre!).
Recipe for the World’s Best Brownies #becauseisaidso
Mise-en-place
Serves: 6-8 (depends on how many you eat before serving guests)
Prep time: 10 min (20 with toddler around)
Cooking time: 35 min
What you will need 75 g dark chocolate chips
175 g unsalted butter, cut into cubes
300 g granulated brown sugar
100 g unsweetened cocoa powder
150 g plain flour, sifted with 1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
4 eggs, mildly whisked
50 g walnuts roughly chopped
25 cm baking tin
Fresh double cream or ice cream for serving An extra hour of workout at the gym
Before you begin Preheat oven to 190°C. Line a 25 cm baking tin with butter, sprinkle some flour and keep aside. Whisk 4 eggs in a bowl, add vanilla extract, whisk some more and keep aside.
Method
Heat a non-stick saucepan on a medium flame. Place the butter, sugar and cocoa powder in the saucepan and stir till the sugar and butter melt. Gently stir, bringing the mixture together till it turns smooth and gooey.
Add the sifted flour slowly, folding it in evenly. Remove the saucepan from the flame.
Add the whisked eggs to the cake mixture, making sure that the heat of the saucepan does not scramble the eggs.
Work fast, adding the chocolate chips and the chopped walnuts. Stir with a gentle hand.
Transfer the mixture to a greased baking tin and bake in a preheated oven at 190°C for 20 minutes.
Allow resting time of 10-20 minutes. Serve warm with fresh double cream or a dollop of ice cream.
It is seriously that simple. Let me know how you get on with it in the comments down below.
Epilogue
Now you are probably wondering what sort of blog platform this is. Is it beauty, food, home, lifestyle or self-love? To begin with, I wanted to do one blog post falling in each of those categories for my first month here. These are the topics that excite me, inspire me, and give me space to grow. This blog is meant to resonate with my style, my experiences as a mother, my choices as an Air Force Wife, and my love for anything creative. I’m always seeking the extraordinary in my ordinary life. I’m just like you, always doubting myself. But I’m also always reminding myself to start small and dream big.
To all my fellow dreamers and creators – our time is now. There is no better time to start doing something you love – go all out, hearts, souls and all.
Happy one month anniversary to me!
Until next time, #dreambig, #believe and #makeithappen. And, EAT MORE BROWNIES.
P.S: I did not eat the whole plate. Okay, maybe most of it.
If you are an obsessive, boring, home body like me who loves to spend a Sunday hanging out with her plants or rearranging all the 40 cushions in the house, then you are going to love this one. Mostly, you will see me walking around the house like a woman on a mission, with the resolve and focus of a criminal just about to attempt his first prison break – just because I take cleaning dead seriously and I need everything to be in its place at all times. I’m the Monica who cannot sleep if her footwear is lying strewn on the floor of the bed. But, I am the mom of a toddler and that means that about a year ago, I had to say a very distressed goodbye to my compulsive behaviour. The stubborn brute that I am, I did not give up – not so easily. I found ways to stay organized in the chaos, whether it was in my surroundings or in my mind.
My home is still a place where a child can play wholeheartedly, a space where we eat chips and watch TV on the bed, a place where love grows, tempers flare, patience is tested, hugs are unlimited and where we can be our messy selves (in moderation!). It is perfect other than the times when it isn’t.
I always eat snacks on bad hair days. How do you cope?My absolute fave place to have some tea – the balcony green nook
Do you wonder if the oh-so-perfect homes of Instagram and decor magazines are real homes belonging to real people who eat, sleep and live there? There’s something so surreal and uber perfect about them that I’m skeptical about their functional quotient. Are such homes realistic in their day-to-day workability and utility?
Also, it is possible to have a cosy, neat home with littles and pets around? To be able to ‘seem’ that you have it all under control – the mommy stuff, the ladyboss stuff and the enviable hostess stuff?
Planning how you decorate your home in the most low maintenance yet glamorous way is the ultimate goal. What you need is just a few easy home ideas that can be seasonally upgraded or changed to fit your needs and your moods.
So, here I am sharing some simple insights into making your home a chic yet practical space. A living, breathing, cosy cumulation of daily things that you won’t be hiding in cupboards only to have to take them out every 5 seconds. A place for everything and everything in its place, smartly stored to accentuate your style and cater to your everyday needs. Personal, well thought out spaces that mirror your style and your vibe. A fluid space with a few statement pieces that you could move around over the weekend to switch up your space and tackle the boredom that arises from everyday homemaking. The ideal juxtaposition of classy chic and mundane practicality. It’s nothing that you haven’t seen or heard before, but it’s a cheatsheet guideline for having a home that looks like it’s well-loved. Here’s my lust for gorgeous living made utilitarian in a few simple, easy to implement decor ideas.
Aesthetic storage solutions
Nobody enjoys coming home to a mess. The only way to tackle things being strewn around the house is to have simple, easy to use storage that looks beautiful and does the job. Placing baskets, caddys, bins, dividers and organizers under sofas, beds or in your pantry can help with decluttering on-the-go. Having a place to dump things rather than having to open cupboards to neatly arrange them, is a good way to avoid messy surroundings. Look for storage that reflects your style and suits your needs. Storing makeup, jewellery, grocery, toys, laundry, stationary or clothes effectively and efficiently saves time and space, helping you stay super organized all the time. Be deliberate and aware to invest in aesthetic, tasteful, photogenic utility, and you have got this one covered.
Green nooks that breathe life
Having a green thumb is a great thing, but not everyone can be the envied plant lady, and that’s okay. A few low maintenance house plants kept under the right amount of sunshine and watered once in a while should do the job. Start with cactuses or succulents that don’t require daily watering. Placing these green babies where you will see them often – like the window sill beside the kitchen counter or outside in your balcony, can help you to remember to care for them. A touch of green inside the home is refreshing, calming and pleasing to the eyes. It brings life and vivacity to your surroundings. It brings freshness to the smell, feel and vibe of your home. If you manage to keep your plants alive, you might think of getting a pet or having a baby next! Read up on house plants and go adopt some (plants, not babies).
Building the character of your home
Make your home a place filled with happy memories and positive experiences. Picture frames, Polaroid photographs, fridge magnets from vacations, posters of things/people/quotes, paintings that inspire you, keep sakes from momentous occasions, a chalkboard with the menu or thought for the day, coffee table books that friends can read, books that have impacted your life, curios that you have collected over the years – these are the little inanimate objects that make your house a home. Put thought into them. Make space for them so they can gracefully craft the character of your home.
Controlling the urge to overcrowd
Too much of a good thing is never any good. Our desires often override our judgment and we end up with the vase that’s too big, the sofa that’s too loud, or the side table that has nothing to be placed beside to. Before you bring a new member into your home, assess practically if you need it, if it resonates with your style, if it can replace something old that you can part with, if it adds value to your space and if it is something you really really want. Overdone or overcrowded spaces tend to look like decorated clutter where no one thing stands out. The statement pieces are drowned amongst the ordinary ones, the gorgeous upholstery or the curtains you had tailor-made are lost in the exaggerated ambience. Guests don’t know what they are supposed to look at.
Do away with whatever you can live without. Create a dynamic, fluid space that is roomy, minimalistic and personal; a space that grants you the freedom to play around with new ideas, experiment, evolve and redecorate within the realms of practical living.
Exploring outside the comfort zone
What we love most about our homes is that sense of familiarity, stability and comfort. We tend to stick to trends that we understand, colours that we like to see, patterns that are our signature styles. But sometimes, it is fun to look outside the box. Update yourself and upgrade your home. Find inspiration on Pinterest and Instagram. Research the latest colour trends and pairings. I saw a lot of inspired interiors sprouting from the ‘rose quartz’ and ‘serenity’ Pantone colours of 2016. And for good reason. Pink had its comeback in a whole different light – people transformed their doors, walls, sofas and rugs from boring neutral accessories to rosy hued statements. Don’t allow yourself to remain fixated to what is safe and known to you; try something new and surprise yourself.
These perky, playful poppies always take me to a happy place in my mind
Creating what isn’t
Adding depth, texture and colour are the simplest ways to make your interiors pop (not too much though!). How you paint your walls, how you design your flooring and how you play around with lighting can enhance how lively your spaces look. Mirrors, distressed or structured walls, fairy lights, or DIY wallpaper decals can add that extra something to your mundane interiors. Spray paint old furniture, garden chairs, metal frames, IKEA shelves or mason jars to create bespoke interiors. Making your home seem spacious when you don’t have much space, making it brighter when you don’t have a lot of natural light streaming in, making it look vibrant and cheerful without using a whole lot of colour – these are the hacks you need to master. Your home is your masterpiece; take your time to design it one bright idea at a time.
Committing to an overall vibe
When flashes of inspiration are all over the web, your creative stimulus and imagination will have you believe that everything that you love, you can include in your home. However much you crave that Bohemian rug, that Parisian white upholstery, that Vogue cover print on a gold frame, or that colourful Indian chest of drawers, you can’t have it all. You are building a home, not a museum. Be inspired by all the creativity, ingenuity and originality, but finally decide what sort of theme your home should reflect. Stick to it till the very end. No hotchpotch of uncoordinated concepts . Mixing trends can be fun, but do it only if you know what you are doing.
Creating the mood (seasonally or occasionally)
It is human nature to nest boredom. You may have accomplished the task of designing the dream home but there will be days when your home makes you feel uninspired, dull, and lifeless. What was in vogue yesterday, may not have the same manic charm today. Go ahead and change the mood of your love nest. Change the bedding, the cushions, the upholstery, the house plants. Add lights, a few photo frames or scented candles, some new cutlery crocks, some fresh hangers maybe? Getting rid of the old, decluttering and creating space for incorporating a new mood into your home isn’t going to be easy. But, every now and then, a new perspective, some new sheets and a new lipstick can do wonders.
Muddling along what we have already discussed above, being smart with your home hauls will be a good place to begin redecorating. When it comes to setting up of your home, the value of adequate research and pragmatic evaluation cannot be understated. That being said, please don’t over think it either. If you love something, go with it. A style, a pattern, a colour, a plant, a wall print – wherever you find magnificence, grab it. Chances are, it’s going to be something that takes your home from being lived in to being cared for. Irrespective of what you place inside your home, a home beaming with love, hope, positivity and gratitude is always going to be the most envied one on the block.
Give these hacks a go and enjoy giving your spaces that much-needed makeover.
P.S: Our home is 15 years old and may not be built in the style that matches today’s trends, but we try to upgrade it in the most resourceful, inventive manner, watchful of avoiding too much wastage or spending big bucks on large restorations.
Until next time, keep your homes gorgeous and your lives full of wonder. XOXO
A good friend once asked me to think about something that changed my whole outlook on being a first-time mother. He said to me ‘what secrets are people not telling you, and what secrets is nature not telling you?’
Through this post, I resolve to change the way moms-to-be and new moms perceive life postpartum. I realize that over time, we collect a lot of unwanted data (related to childbirth and newborn care) from different sources (books, people, google). How do we create substantial, workable knowledge from it all? How do we keep the value and discard the waste? Essentially, how do we prioritize and practice self-love over self-harm? How do we know that we are really ‘prepared’? And how do we cope with situations that nothing can prepare us for?
This is going to be a long one. Get comfortable with a blankie and some coffee.
Facts over fiction
When I thought about what my friend had asked me, I realized that most of my stress, hopelessness and loss of confidence sprouted from assumptions I had made about being a mother. Assumptions that were powered by people’s opinions, lies, half-baked stories and misconceptions about postpartum life. I will tell you today (and you will thank me one day for my brutal honesty), that the first 3-6 months of being a new mom suck. It is thoroughly gruelling and one-sided in the sense that the baby is too young to show any responsive behaviour or affection. It is all about giving and getting nothing in return. There are moments of unconditional love and happy tears but they are few and rare.
I don’t want to tread on the safe territory of diplomacy. Gushing about little baby toes isn’t compensation for the demanding times that are to follow. So if you need to hear the mollycoddled version, stop reading. I understand that the hard truth is painful, but it is this truth which will help us prepare for what’s coming. Every mother I spoke to before childbirth told me wonderful things, stories of priceless moments and joyful milestones. Nobody prepared me for the ugly days, the confusing situations, the demanding nights. After all the stories I had heard, I was still clueless.
The tip of the iceberg
Research over remorse
My failure to cope with these circumstances made the joyful moments seem too small or too short-lived. You may ask me here: Did you do your reading? Your research? Yes, more than enough. Not just on pregnancy, but on parenting, child psychology and dealing with postpartum stress. Honestly, no what-to-expect book can really tell you what to expect in reality, just like no book can really prepare you for walking head-on into the epicentre of a storm.
Every baby is different and so is every mother, but what remains common is that 6-month postpartum period of extreme stress, sleep deprivation, PPD, the inability to develop instant attachment with your baby, 10 hours of breast-feeding (in the first few weeks), a non-existent sex life or strained relationships with friends and family. Every one of us will face at least 2 or more of these situations. Shouldn’t it be imperative that we prepare ourselves for these times? There are simple solutions to all these problems, but during a period of such chaos, our judgement is clouded. We are vulnerable, impressionable and consumed by our baby’s demands. Our decisions are based on the preachings of other mothers or the elders of the family. We allow them to govern our thoughts, inadvertently nurturing mothers’ guilt or feeling pressured to do the supposed right thing, often at the cost of our health, inconvenience or discomfort.
Acceptance over defensiveness
Is there a way to avoid being dragged along this maternity current? Are mothers even willing to accept that they faced similar challenges? Or are we going to continue raving about the rewards of being a mother, defensively pushing aside any negativity that surrounds it. When can we start accepting that it is ok to feel overwhelmed, disappointed, unwanted, unmotivated, dispassionate or disillusioned? It is time to start associating these negative feelings with motherhood; it is time to start tackling these emotions presumptively. There is nothing shameful about being an unhappy mother sometimes and talking about it in order to change/improve that state of mind. Positivity can get you places, but only when you know you lack it, can you harness it. Happy, healthy mothers raise happy, healthy babies. A healthy mind is the absolute key to raising children who will understand the importance of self-love.
Research, learn, grow, take control
Mindspace over mothers’ guilt
Mother’s guilt, the obsessive belief that everything that is going wrong with regard to the baby is your fault or that you aren’t doing something right, and that being selfish is unacceptable. When my son was born, friends and family flocked to see him; he was the attraction, the attention seeker. My cousin, who has twins, said to me “everyone will pay attention to the baby, you must pay attention to yourself”. I didn’t understand it then but I do now.
Making time for yourself is not going to be possible for a while, but making mindspace for yourself a few minutes everyday is a good place to start. Reading a book, chatting with a friend, listening to some music, meditating or just taking a short walk alone is sufficient to begin with. I wouldn’t recommend browsing your phone or watching TV as these don’t really help you connect with yourself, in addition to being counter effective for sleep deprived mothers. Take 10 minutes off from the baby and the world. Trust me, they won’t notice.
The app ‘Headspace’ has 10-minute meditation modules for pregnancy, stress, sleep etc
Sleep over slog
The most under-rated postpartum stress factor is loss of sleep. Sleep deprivation can cause serious health issues including depression and weight gain. Mothers will tell you it’s common, it’s no big deal. Sleep when the baby sleeps. But, what if you can’t? What if the untimely sleep pattern has skewed your circadian rhythm? What if you have constant headaches or simply feel like an insomniac? What if knowing that you need to wake up in 2 hours for the next feed keeps you wide awake? And what if you need to complete your home chores when the baby is sleeping?
I’m sorry to report that the first few weeks will be hell to the power of n. Once the baby begins to correct its biological clock, you will reach the dreadful fork at the end of the road. Co-sleep or crib? Breast or bottle? Slow progression into removing night feeds or the one-time cry it out? Decisions, decisions. I can recommend books that will help you make informed decisions (see end of blog), but finally please remember – YOU NEED SLEEP. You have not slept for weeks (probably months); you need to put yourself first. Babies who sleep with their moms, have formula from a bottle or are cuddled to sleep when they wake up at night, finally turn out to be as weird as those who never co-sleep, are exclusively breast feed and are left to self-soothe. In the big scheme of things, it doesn’t really matter. What matters is that you keep your sanity through this whole process, that you feel fit, healthy, happy and well-rested. Stop feeling guilty, do what it takes to start sleeping. Use whatever method you like to stop night feeds. The baby doesn’t need it after a point. Babies feed at night for comfort not for food (after they start on solids). If breast-feeding is the attraction, stop it. Give her a bottle. Do your research for alternatives. She will hate it and stop waking up at night. It is important to understand that babies, just like adults, have optimum digestion when their stomachs get 10-12 hours of rest in a 24-hour time period. It is also a scientific fact that babies that sleep through the night take longer and stronger day naps. So it is a win-win. Trust me, it will be the best thing you ever do for yourself.
Missing some concealer here, but then you don’t have it on when you wake up at 4 am to do this!
Zen mode over judgemental mode
You prepared yourself for an all-natural childbirth but at the very last-minute, you were forced to go in for a C-sec (for medical causes). Or, you decided you wanted an epidural. Or, your body didn’t produce enough food for your baby so you gave her formula in a bottle. Then, you were disturbingly judged. Even when you didn’t have a choice. Yes, a vaginal birth means faster recovery for the mother. But, you and your baby are safe and that’s all that matters. Yes, you couldn’t bear it so you took an epidural. No two women have the same pain threshold nor do they experience labour in the same way. You got rid of the pain and saved your energy for the last mile. Good girl. Yes, breast milk is perfectly suited to fulfil your newborn’s needs. But, formula isn’t poison. It is formulated to mimic breast milk as far as possible. Your baby is not sleeping hungry, it’s all good . The point is, no matter what you do, people will judge. They will judge you for the choices nature made for you and the choices you make for your/your baby’s well-being. These nincompoops speak from theoretical knowledge, not experience. Do whatever works best for you and your baby.
If another mother judges you, then feel sorry for her. She has no compassion for herself and therefore, none that she can offer you.
So much for trying to meditate with my toddler around!
Faith over fear
You are not a bad mother because you allowed your baby to cry while you took 10 seconds to compose yourself. The biggest lesson of motherhood is to know which battles to fight and when to silently walk away. Have unwavering faith in yourself – in your judgements, in the principles you want your baby to imbibe. It’s going to be a whole lot of tough love and the absolute test of patience. But have faith in the power of educating your baby rather than disciplining her through bribing, pleading or threatening. Lastly, have faith in your baby. She can and will understand you; it will take a whole lot of repetition and hard work. There is no fast lane. Be present with her in every single moment – a rewarding attribute of motherhood that nobody ever talks about. You are/will be a supermom and you know it. Remember that you must choose your battles wisely. On a bad day, walk away and count to 10. On a really bad day, hand her over to hubby and meet a girlfriend for coffee and gossip. But always, always remember to kiss your baby (and your husband) goodnight. Tomorrow will be a better day (oh well, one can always dream!).
Being present is the most powerful form of love
Gratitude over grievance
The simple act of giving gratitude for everything life has blessed you with will help you see the light even on the darkest of days. It is easier said than done. But the next time you feel overwhelmed, take a notebook and jot down 10 things you feel grateful for. Around number 6, you will see your mood lift. It will not solve your problems, but it will remind you that this too will pass.
Write down all the things that you are grateful for today
Communication over distress
However, if you feel the need to let out the fumes, talk to your hubby, your mum, a bestie perhaps? Communicating is the only way you are going to get through this without going cray-cray. If it is help you need, ask for it. When you are offered help, put that ego aside and accept it graciously. Even if it’s just a small gesture like someone sending you pie for dinner, or a friend offering to babysit while you wash your greasy hair.
If it is emotional support you need, speak to other empathetic moms who get you. If it’s really bad and nothing works, take professional help. PPD is a real thing. It is unhealthy for you and your family, so don’t think twice if you need to seek help. If it is domestic support that you need, hire it. Pay them a tonne of money to do everything for you. Take those five MAC lipsticks out of your e-cart, move them to your wish list for another time. There is nothing that can’t be solved if you communicate with the right people at the right time. Be open to open your heart to those who want to help you get through this. Your loved ones can’t read your mind, especially when you laugh and cry at the same time. So help them help you. Speak up.
Needs over wants
I wanted to address this one right at the end because this is a controversial one. You must keep in mind that having a baby is a 48-hour job on a 24-hour timeline. Conclusively, there is no time for socializing, watching Netflix, taking a long shower, online shopping, traveling, night-outs, going to the gym, baking, pursuing other hobbies or simply doing nothing. Yes, that’s a thing. Doing nothing will never be what you say when you pick up the phone. But, don’t lose heart. This is a temporary feature. After the first 3 months, you can do some of these things some of the time. But mind you, it’s not going to be like the old times. Expecting things to be the same is to set yourself up for failure.
So be realistic in your visualisation of a perfect vacation. It may be a long sequence of tantrums or your baby may be her angelic best. It’s a risk you should be willing to take every single time you want to do any of the aforementioned recreational activities. If that is too much for you to cope with – you could stay in your comfort zone, cutting down on travel and social commitments, hence allowing your baby to stay rooted to her routine. I’m not saying this is what you should do. I’m saying you always have an option. Promotion at work, friends, travel can wait a few months. Your baby will not depend on you so deeply once she grows up a little. Doing ‘things’ with babies is not for everyone. You and your baby need to be able to handle it, and enjoy it. Otherwise, what’s the point?
Moreover, babies are creatures of habit. They can’t read the clock or see the sunset. Their only clues lie in the everyday patterns you set for them. Routines make them feel like they are in control, imparting a sense of familiarity and security. If someone asks you to put your social needs over your baby’s comfort, then you will need to find a new friend. Because, moderation is the only solution. A little of everything, enough to keep you going (but never at the cost of your baby’s discomfort). Honestly, are you really going to enjoy that movie if your baby is yelling her guts out? Take a step back and change your perspective. Put baby to bed at 8pm. Plan dinner and movie night with hubby. Much easier. Stress busted. Do what you can, when you can without adding any more unnecessary stress to your already super crazy life.
The only time I enjoy getting my nose bitten!
That’s all I have for today. Thank you for sticking with me till the end. You can slowly ruminate over this overload of information. Comment down below if there is anything more I can help you with. I hope this is something you can carry with you in your journey through pregnancy, childbirth and early motherhood.
See you back again very soon. Until next time, stay gorgeous. XOXO.
Books, apps and people that inspired me
First time mommy:Mimi Ikonn (follow her on You Tube and IG for a daily dose of positivity and self-love)
No matter what life throws at you, you will see the silver lining if you believe in yourself. When you feel tired of dealing with people, situations or a whole lot of bad luck, sometimes all you need is a memory of a happy place, a shoulder to cry on or a makeover maybe? Yes, I really do believe that feeling beautiful (not just looking it) can make you happier than you think. Loving and accepting your flaws for what they are and appreciating or feeling grateful for all the good stuff in your life will transform you into that beaming ray of sunshine that sends good vibes over to ever passerby. Beauty is within you; for you to love and give to others you first need to do it for yourself. Take care of yourself. Pamper and spoil yourself. You don’t have to feel guilty about it. No, it isn’t a waste of time. It is an investment in yourself. Every management book will tell you how you sell yourself everyday to everyone. So why not be ready for the day when Mr Big (or your hot-ass ex) bumps into you, or the day when your decade old husband falls in love with you all over again? Why not wear ruby woo to the gym? Why not carry your big skincare pouch on an overnight trip? Why not blow dry your hair for date nights with hubby? And why-oh-why not wear sexy lingerie inside your sweatpants!! Who made these rules anyway! Show me one woman who doesn’t feel good when she looks good. So why confine yourself to stereotypes, society norms and these guidelines that you set for yourself. You can wear red lipstick and can still be taken seriously. Let’s break these walls. Let’s catwalk on the long and boring runway of our daily lives. Walk into shit with high heels and waterproof mascara. Come out of it with a broken heel and a vulnerable heart but with a whole lot of confidence, a strong will and the courage to fight hard. Whatever you do, do it in style.
Pardon me if I sound girlboss-ish. I’m not referring to the working woman alone, but also the awkward teenager, the homemaker, the mother, the wife, or the uncertain entrepreneur. I don’t mean that you should wear a whole lot of makeup on the outside and be fake on the inside. Or that loads of makeup and a blow dry will get you places (come on, you can’t deny that a good hair day fixes everything). Only hard work will get you places. But, looking after the way you look shows that you care. Your image is a part of your personality. It is the first impression you make and 90% of the people you meet in your life will only know you by how you present yourself. So, put time and thought into it every single day.
We are entering a world where we love perfect pictures on perfect locations, perfect snippets of ordinary lives, and perfect stories of love, travel, overnight successes and inspired living. Everything is a projection, a half truth, a photoshopped story, a virtual reality. We are constantly comparing our lives (often unintentionally) to those of online bloggers/vloggers/you tubers. We aspire to be like them, to have everything they do. We try positive thinking, we try hard work, we hustle. But no matter what we do, we don’t look hot waking up and yawning in bed. We don’t drink herbal teas from quirky mugs while petting the dog. We don’t beautify our oats porridge with blueberries and coconut flakes. We don’t see pink sunsets everyday. We don’t pose at the infinity pool for a drone shot. And, we definitely do not do our makeup to clean out the closet. Reality check please. What you see is orchestrated reality. It is diligently conceived, planned, shot, edited, improved, projected- extraordinary moments from ordinary lives. And, let’s face it, we want to witness these magical, surreal, and inspirational moments. They make us believe in the promise of abundance, of wealth, of perfect bodies and unconditional relationships. So how do we compartmentalise this virtual grandeur from the simplicity of all that money cannot buy. Stop visualising and start realising. There is no better time than now to realise that you already have everything you need to be the best version of yourself. Don’t let anyone damp your mojo. Be kind, grateful, beautiful. Be you. Hot as hell, ready to take ’em on.
I’m a big fan of IG (Instagram) myself and ever since I had a baby I’ve constantly felt that sense of severe FOMO (fear of missing out). I wanted to do something, anything. I wanted to be someone. But I couldn’t make the time or manage the resources. I tried time and again, feeling the frustration build every time I failed. I compared myself to the online moms; I judged myself to the point of feeling hopeless. It’s funny how social media can make you feel so small. And yet, it is the most amazing way to connect to like minded, beautiful people around the globe. My resources now include a computer, a camera, some supportive friends and all these thoughts. I have an obsessive love for all things beauty, home, lifestyle (like 10 million others). I’m here to join a large fraternity of bloggers who I so deeply admire. And if you have actually gotten to the end of this midnight rant, maybe I have some teeny tiny potential.
And so, my first blog post goes out to every woman who knows she is beautiful.
